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·Å´ó×ÖÌå  ËõС×ÖÌå ·¢²¼ÈÕÆÚ£º2008-12-19
ºËÐÄÌáʾ£ºIt has often been said that opposites attract but research suggests that initial spark of attraction soon fades and does not make for a long and happy married life. A survey carried out by The Oxford Internet Institute, looked at the habits of 1,000


    It has often been said that opposites attract but research suggests that initial spark of attraction soon fades and does not make for a long and happy married life.

    A survey carried out by The Oxford Internet Institute, looked at the habits of 1,000 couples to find the secret of a happy relationship.

    The poll was conducted for online matchmaking service eHarmony.

    People who want to sign up for the site, complete a comprehensive questionnaire of more than 200 questions, which takes about an hour to complete.

    "At the time that we launched in 2000, people were really sceptical that you could bring technology or scientific research to something that had always been attributed in these magical terms to some unknowable quality about why two people connect," Greg Waldorf, eHarmony's chief executive said.

    eHarmony to claim that every day on average 118 US couples who met on eHarmony get married--2% of the total number of marriages.

    Paula Hall, a relationship psychotherapist at the UK relationship service says: "Compatibility is an essential ingredient in relationship happiness, but some differences are inevitable. How couples manage those differences is the key to long-term success."

    But there is not one formula for all couples. Analysis of the data gathered by eHarmony shows that across cultures couples value very different things.

    For instance, Britons are the least likely to complain if modern life leaves their partners too tired for sex. Australians are less worried by their spouse being less affectionate and Americans argue more.

    Happily married people in the UK tend to agree more on how to make major decisions, how family finances are handled, the division of household tasks, and how to deal with parents and in-laws. Compared to the US and Australia, UK couples are the least likely to be worried if their partner is regularly too tired for sex.

    In the US, couples put more focus on the interpersonal facets of their relationships, reporting that they laugh together, exchange ideas, kiss, and confide in each other more often. However, they also have more arguments and are more likely to report that their partners annoy them.

    In Australia, couples put a lot of stock in working on projects together, and it is the country where couples are least likely to be concerned that their spouse doesn't show enough love and affection.

    Couples in the US, the UK and Australia experience a dip in marital satisfaction around the birth of their first child, which Mr Waldorf attributes to a period of adjustment to the change in the relationship. Chinese couples, by contrast, actually experience a rise in satisfaction, which Mr Waldorf suggests is due to a stronger immediate family support network.

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